blessed.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
[ Jeremiah 29:11 ]

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Saturday, October 07, 2006

11:27 pm

[j-reflections: septober2006]

Part II

220906

Gahh. GP paper was bad. I had writer’s block for both the essay and the comprehension. Can you imagine? Writer’s block even for compre questions. And I’m not even talking about AQ. Failure to complete paper goes without saying. I felt that I did my best at that point in time and in the preparation for the paper though.

I don’t like it when people say “everything is alright”. It just reminds me about Kingshaw in “I am the King of the Castle” (elective lit book). Kingshaw keeps telling himself “everything is alright” and committed suicide in the end -_-“

230906

:’( :’( :’(

Both my parents strongly dissuaded me from going to church to study for promos. I pleaded with them a few times. Sigh. I was looking forward to going to church the whole week, especially after mental torment and questioning studies, to just be in God’s presence, worshipping and singing praises unto Him with other believers. Not that one cannot worship and praise God at home but it’s what I always looked forward towards, week after week after week of school. I always worked towards the weekend and what made the weekend particularly enjoyable was the chance to gather with God’s people in church and to worship together with them =)

250906:

I heard someone saying the word “cook” in Bishan CC (BCC) study room. Then, I suddenly thought: isn’t it amazing how humans have the ability to flavour our food, make it tasty etc. unlike animals. They have to accept what they get. Same/similar food everyday leh! I’m even bored of eating the same food from the hawker centres near my home (which I’ve been staying in for 17 years)… animals have to eat same food for the rest of their lives? We have MUCH to be thankful for.

For some reason, I suddenly recalled my O Level Malay (Special Programme) paper. Ahaha. There were only around 4 people taking exams in the whole big school hall. Ahaha. The rest were taking Mother Tongue B or something. Ah. The O Level days, so distant, yet so near. Distant because its over. Distant because of where I stand academically now. Yet, so near because I have is the IKEA box filled with O level stuff in the corner of my living room. Near because the person sitting next to me at BCC is studying for it.

260906:

kan4 de2 kai1 already. I no longer felt stupid for studying even though no one pushed me to do so. Perhaps it’s just the way I’m created. Argh. I don’t want to go into the whole nature/nurture thing [GP/philo]. Either way, or rather a combination of both, I am the way I am now. I shouldn’t do something that I would not feel comfortable doing, such as not studying or something.

Also, there was a middle-aged lady sitting beside me at BCC. She was studying O Level subjects. I inferred that she was a private candidate. Then I looked at myself. Janice! This lady beside you probably had no chance to take O Levels before, and here you are, blessed with the opportunity to so A Level studies in NJC and yet you are complaining?!? Since I am here already, I might as well make the best out of this experience. Does complaining and being frustrated help at all? NO. It’ll only make yourself more miserable, and even affect those around you. [It’s really sad that we often do not know how fortunate we are until we open our eyes to those around us.] Everything is in God’s hands. God has a wonderful plan and purpose for us, wherever and whoever we are. Doing your best wherever God has allowed you to be pleases Him =) I don’t know why I couldn’t see it this way few days ago, even though that’s what people say. Sometimes, you have to experience things for yourself before you accept the theory. (Heh. Of course it doesn’t apply to everything.) So after that, I was full of joy. Even math didn’t seem that tough, and I did math the whole day. Really, I finally understood the joy and pleasure of studying for God and doing my best because he placed me there. I could imagine God was looking down at me from heaven, pleased that I was doing my best ^_^

Question 20, Pg 300 of H2 Mathematics TB has this question: Anna’s brother suggests that she marks our a circular plot rather than a rectangular plot to give her an even bigger are. Anna is confused and decided to consult you (j-comments: HAHA!). What advice would you give Anna? I thought: rectangle. Don’t be greedy. It’s easier to manage a rectangular plot instead of a circle one =P haha

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